On Treating Others

I am in a software development business and working with immensely talented people. I have been in this business for 15 years and worked for four companies - the talent pool always seems to be the same. As I see it, these talented people come with exceptionally different behavior - some of them do have an elephant-like ego; some of them modest, a few are real geeks that seem to be oblivious to their surrounding, and others ... ok, you get my drift. Working with these talented people taught me a lot on how to respect differences and be able to work with each other. I hope this lesson will stay with me forever.

Treating people require basic decency and that should be applied to all people regardless of their position in the company hierarchy or by their popularity amongst other people. If you work with a full-time employee and a contractor (temporary employee with short period of contract) you should see both of them the same way. Both of them are human beings and both of them do have feelings and emotions - it is unnatural to consider the contracto to be different or as somebody to be pushed around.

Early in my career, I was working for a consulting company. I was assigned to different client sites working on specific projects with my own colleagues or working embedded in the clients' development teams. At that time, I was having back pain that was bothering me - the pain was unbearable so I contemplated to have surgery. I told my my colleagues from the client company and they felt my situation. Some of them were very compassionate and even helping me looking for the right doctor. ultimately, the news reached to the team manager. One day when I was about to go home at the end of the day, I met the manager in the lower deck of the parking lot while he was smoking cigarette. He stopped me and asked me when I was going to have surgery. I was sure I did not discuss it with him since I did not make the final decision yet. At the beginning, I was very happy that he was concerned about my situation - so, I thanked him for being concerned. Before I finished my sentence, he waved his hand to signal me to stop and he said he does not care about my surgery. He went on to say that his concern was to get appropriate replacement. Wow - the disparaging hand wave and the words following after that got into me. It was a blow - I went quietly (and probably shaking my head) to get my car on the upper deck (lucky him I did not park my car on the lower level:-) ). How did the lively and seemingly nice guy turn out to be so insensitive? Do not get me wrong - I am not being a cry baby and I understand the situation he had to deal with. But, was this the right way? Would he treat full-time employees the same way?

The moral is to treat everybody with respect - recognize that we are emotional animals. Actually, We all need to be emotionally intelligent so that we can work with others in the new and continuously changing world. Having an emotional intelligence is one of the main qualities for a leader and it all starts with treating people right. We all do have strengths and weaknesses - working in a team of people requires understanding each other well. Diversity in behavior, culture, interest, and other traits should not be seen as a challenge but as an opportunity. Opportunity that can take us all to a different level; opportunity that can bring about our survival best - it is a healthy relationship to have.

Currently Reading: Outliers: The Story of Success by Malcolm Gladwell

P.S.: I did not go through surgery - I learned to live with back pain via physical therapy. It was not affecting me for a long time other than occasional hick-ups here and there.